Friday, November 03, 2006

The Line is Wrong, Bob

Today the Cornell Daily Sun decided to take pity on the pathetic guys of campus and try to give them some game. Too bad that help comes in the form of really bad pick-up lines. Some of their suggestions:

“You’re ugly, but you intrigue me.”
---Maybe this would work without the first bit. Expect a slap with this line.

“You’ll do.”
---You are pathetic.

“If you were a function, I wish I was your derivative, so I could lay tangent to your curves.”
---Nerd Alert!! Although some smart girls may think of a witty math pun telling you to get lost.

This need for cheesy lines is not healthy. I overheard two boys on the Engineering quad talking about "I just can't talk to girls!"... it's just not that hard people.

Say hi.

Compliment her.

Make her laugh.

Don't compare her to a mathematical function.

You will be well on your way to a girlfriend... or one for the night.

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